A Sequel Of Romance

Part 2

An immutable decision:

"Decision" is such a word which claims a settlement with own self. Whatever we decide results to our choice. For me as well the rule didn't change.

My final semester's results were out. I managed to succeed to fifth standard with mom's oppressive ways of tutorial. Classes usually started. New subjects were introduced like political science and social studies, biology etc which was considered essential in the development of a child's knowledge by the school authority. Bags became too heavy than before making us realised that we were growing up. With the increased number of books, mom's intense ways of tuition enhanced.

I was very fond of reading stories, watching cartoons and writing poems. Sometimes I intended to interest myself with hand crafts and paintings. However Mom forced me to stop everything. Because she thought it was effecting my career. Her thought never gave joy to me. Her extended violence was an arena of pain for me. My weekends passed crying for Clara who was like a glimpse of sunlight in my dark life and reading Ady's letter hided from mom. I didn't have much friend in that impeccable school.

In the world of perfection may be I was looking for someone imperfect. I used to talk to everyone but less. Days passed with mom and her disappointing ways.

One day I was studying as another final semester was near by. It was raining outside. Though the science book was opened infront of me but my mind was somewhere else. I was thinking about Clara. The sudden way she snapped her bonding even before our relationship flourished.

"Where is Clara? I miss her lunch box and the gossip that we had in schools. We used to play in the playground on my way to school which had stopped. We thought of arranging a grand marriage for our dolls. That remained unfinished. "

Suddenly a tight slap. It was the lighting before a violent storm. Mom was standing with a stick. I was so afraid that my lips froze. I couldn't speak. Only words I heard was from mom's mouth "why aren't you studying?" After that all I felt was the intense bashing. I fell down from the bed crying. My mind was murmuring "Ady!!!!! Clara!!!!". But unfortunately there was no sound came when mind spoke and hence no one listened. Why that happened, I don't know!!!

I screamed abruptly. As felt earlier, mom's un-wanted ways thrived anger within me. Mom stopped. I struggled but stood up and clearly explained her in a loud yelling tone that I would not take any help from her in my studies any more. She slowly lower down her voice and moved to her own room. From that day onwards I started to be my own tutor. I was assisted soully and only by my school teachers.

I vividly remember that night I took my first decision. I was ten years old. I was crying in my room, trying to sleep as I was tired but couldn't. My mind was hovering around Ady's memory. I woke up and built-in a piece on my little purple diary.

"Dear Ady,

I pray for your good health. I wanted to reply you that day but you went in too hurry. I came to city and started my new life but still now I haven't got a friend like you. Waiting for you to meet me. You said we will meet? Can we really meet ever or it was like the same old prank that you did with me. Was it like the game of hide and seek which will never end ?"

My fingers stopped. Without completing, I bursted out into tears. Even my hand couldn't write the hardship I was going through. Struggling with others or with a difficult situation is comparatively easy. My struggle was with my ownself. The little Tiara inside, baffled to narrate the hardship I was experiencing !!

To Be Continued.....................